


A Crumpled Letter

by crowfics



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-30
Updated: 2016-08-18
Packaged: 2018-07-11 02:17:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7022536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crowfics/pseuds/crowfics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kenma realized that he liked Shoyou, and he figured out the best way to confess would be to give him a letter. But will he ever give him that letter?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> enjoy! I listened to I'd Like to Walk Around in Your Mind by Vashti Bunyan while writing this.

Shaking, quivering hands brought to his chest, it seemed as if the air pressure in the gymnasium suddenly increased to 1000 degrees and his body temperature was through the roof. The letter in the sealed envelop was crumpled now. He had promised himself he was gonna do it, now before nationals or anything else. Now, before if anything that could happen to cause a team to lose. Now, before he could watch Shouyou leave on that bus again.

Shouyou seemed to brighten every place he stood, well more like bounced. Shouyou was usually springing about, whether it be jumping into the air to spike a ball, or bounce around watching the excitement around him. Kenma knew he couldn’t keep up with him, which was why he kept his distance, but Shouyou always drew near him. And he couldn’t say that he didn’t enjoy his presence. He found himself becoming excited whenever he heard a mention of the flying crow, whether it be in regular practice, he straightened up and unconsciously began to smile the tiniest of smiles.

_How could someone make him feel, happy?_

Kenma never knew exactly why he liked video games so much, maybe it was he could be somewhere different, be someone different, he didn’t have to worry about getting hurt in this world. Okay maybe, but he could just regenerate in his game, restart the level, have his progress erased. Here, if he messed up, it would be known, and no magical game maker could erase his mistakes and give him the grace of being able to start over. Getting hurt in a game was nothing compared to getting hurt in the real world, he had always been a shy kid, but he was wary of people and what they might say about him. That’s why he didn’t want to hand that letter to Shouyou, but was easily the funniest person, the kindest person, _oh dear god_ _I’m in so deep._

What was even worse, Kuroo was onto him. Kuroo being the smart-ass that he was of course had some sort of knowing to Kenma’s likening to Shouyou. He could feel Kuroo’s challenging gaze on him as he watched Shouyou in glimpses during their practice matches. _Damn you Kuroo._

Hinata saw Kenma’s gaze, and waved to him. He was back to reality again, hiding the letter in the inner pocket of his jacket.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please enjoy this continuation!

The glow of Kenma’s DS radiated into the pitch black room. Unable to focus on the screen directed in front of his gaze, he shut the DS and laid in the darkness. He had lost the fucking letter. Kenma was never the one to lose things, _how the hell did this happen?_

Kenma thought back to the day’s events, to try and retrace his steps. The letter had always been in his jacket and now it was gone, magically disappeared without a trace. He had worn his crimson Nekoma jacket at the start of the day for breakfast, he for sure had it then. A practice match against Fukurodani, then it got blurry from how many teams they had played. Shutting his eyes, he attempted to remember anything past the Fukurodani match. His jacket was sitting on the bench with his water bottle, the letter safely tucked inside. However, the rising temperatures in the gymnasium of the day only gave him memories of the heat instead of what he wanted to remember.

How did he even lose the letter in the first place? Walking into the hall and away from the other sleeping Nekoma members, he turned on the hall light to examine his jacket himself. The regular side pockets were empty. _Left inner pocket check. Right inner pocket_ \- his fingers slipped through a gaping hole. _Fuck._

A stupid hole in his jacket would be his undoing, a hole to make sure that he’d be scrambling to find a crumpled letter before no one else did. But what if someone else had already found it? Oh god, he could see the taunts from his team members already.

_Sitting on a bench in front of him, Kuroo twiddled a letter between his fingers._

_"Oi Oi Kenma, what do you have here?” He taunted, giving his signature Cheshire grin._

_He couldn’t answer him, only to extend his hand out to grasp at the letter. Yet frustratingly, it was held above his head._

_"What are you hiding from me? You can’t reach the letter with your vertical, seemingly only chibi-chan could get it,” he smirked. The ghastly lighting gave his childhood friend Kuroo a sinister shadow, warping his features in an ominous way. If he was Alice in Wonderland, Kuroo would be the Cheshire Cat, appearing and disappearing with a smirk and only leaving him to question how he even got there._


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi there! thank you for reading this and I hope you enjoy!

Breathe. Kenma knew Kuroo certainly wasn’t some malicious person, but he did like teasing. He could see it in his facial expressions, raised eyebrows and a small smile as if to say,  _ Oh yeah?  _

Kuroo’s reaction was the least of his problems, other people finding out would be way worse. Kuroo was easy compared to some others reactions.  _ Oh he hadn’t even thought if another team had found it. _ Nekoma he could handle, but Fukurodani? He could practically see Bokuto making a ruckus over the letter. However, Akaashi was the sense of reason behind Fukurodani, he was always the one to easily read Bokuto. With a taciturn tone, he could calm the rising waves that were the commotion of Fukurodani. (The high-rising waves of Fukurodani were mostly Bokuto though.)

_ Or what if Karasuno found it. _ His breath stopped short at that moment. Shouyou finding the letter, and oh god what if he read it in front of everyone.  _ Please, oh god if you find the letter Shouyou do not read it in front of everyone _ , sending a silent prayer. At this point, he wished he had told Shouyou, despite probably never saying it in the right way, he would know his feelings.

A small expression of tenderness could be seen on Kenma’s face at the moment, just even thinking about Karasuno’s decoy made him warm inside.  _ How did this even happen, how did he even start to like Shouyou?  _ It was a downward spiral. Shouyou’s warm grin, his bright twinkling eyes, his voice even. It was everything about him, but the small details about Hinata were what radiated to Kenma’s heart the most. He hadn’t known what it felt like to be ignited by someone until now, even though it was a spark, the small flame grew with passing days, and it kept him warm when he needed it. Shouyou’s flame was what he loved the most about him, because that flame melted his edges away and he didn’t have to think anymore.  _ Only him. _

It was too late for thinking about this right now. The letter was still floating around at the training camp somewhere.

The situation was so unpredictable though, there were countless ways things could go wrong if someone found the letter and of course decided to read it. Nekoma’s brain was at a loss for a logical procedure of what to do. Should he just give up and let someone find it? Be assertive with others and ask if they had seen a letter floating around? Or just go through the maze to find it by himself, and hope he reaches the end in time?

_ Ugh. _ He would have to just find it on his own, because there was no way he was asking Kuroo for help. But could he just ask Kuroo to find the letter and then not expect him to read it? He couldn’t have that happen. Guess it was going to be Kenma against his own fate, to find the letter and give it to Shouyou before time ran out. If only this were a videogame, he would have been able to conquer this way easier. Reality hit him. This wasn’t something he could control but forge his own path instead. Fate’s onyx hands slipping around the hands of a clock, dragging the hands along and scraping minutes by into what felt like seconds. It was him up against fate, and only he had the power to do something. It was time for action.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it's been so long,,,but I am back.

Beams of sunshine found their way through pale curtains, dust rising up and twirling around in the rays that crossed the room. Raising a hand to shield his face from the sunlight, Kenma remembered his mission. He groaned. 

“Everyone get up! Lev stop lying around and dozing off! We have breakfast soon!” Yaku’s voice pierced through the room. More groaning and sighing came from corners of the room.

Slowly rising up, Kenma grabbed his toothbrush and made his way to the bathroom. If a mirror could depict how done Kenma was with the world, this one certainly did it. A frowning reflection peered back at him, with stray hairs poking out of his head in an unorthodox manner.  _ Why today?  _ He wondered. Kuroo’s yawn and stretches made him move out of the way, he looked up to find his hair was disastrous as usual.

“What are you thinking about Kenma?” Kuroo said while brushing his teeth.  _ Oh right, that’s what he had came here to do.  _ It seemed his thoughts had slipped him of doing a simple task again.

“Nothing,” he replied, beginning to brush his teeth as well. 

Kuroo raised an eyebrow, already onto him, but said nothing.

 

****

_ I think I’m going to die. _

Shouyou was across the whole gymnasium, but he could still hear the sounds of excitement that emitted from him. Kenma was just starting to focus in with warmups for the upcoming scrimmage, but he was distracted by Shouyou once again. Wisps of hair crept their way into his view, but his cheeks still managed to flush even looking at the blur of Karasuno’s decoy.

It was just too much. He stood there, staring, not even realizing it until Kuroo’s slinky voice reminded him it was time to start the match. His team was suddenly in a circle ready to do a quick pep-talk before the game began.

“Remember to not let the ball drop-,” Kuroo began.

_ It was a cold fall evening, but a relaxing fire and blankets kept Kenma and Shouyou warm as they played videogames together. Kenma’s feet unconsciously curled underneath the fuzzy blanket, drawing underneath himself in a more relaxing position. Hot cocoa rested at the table in front of the couch where Shouyou and Kenma sat. _

_ "I think I’m a little tired,” Shouyou said with a small smile. In the light of the fire, the tips of his hair glowed. It was like a sunrise melting into horizon, only more beautiful. “You can continue to play if you want, I think I’m just gonna watch,” he spoke, resting his head on Kenma’s shoulder. _

_ Kenma realized that the fire and blankets weren’t what made him warm, it was Shouyou near him. _

_ The glow of the D.S continued, as Kenma played on, despite his heart beating a little more faster, yet feeling more peaceful than he had ever been. Shouyou’s locks tickled his neck, as he could feel his breaths becoming slower. He didn’t have to look over to know Shouyou was falling asleep on him. All he ever wanted was- _

“Hey Kenma! Wake up!” Kuroo clapped his hands. He had been daydreaming, and Kuroo’s annoying clapping had woken him back to reality. No sleeping Shouyou, just volleyball.


End file.
